Our Present Action Overrides Regret!

Our Present Action Overrides Regret!

“Regret of neglected opportunity is the worst hell
that a living soul can inhabit. ”

— Rafael Sabatini

Each day our lives offer us unlimited opportunities to be happy, to do the right thing, to make a difference, to create beauty, to heal a wound, to lift up another, to express unconditional love.

 The fulfillment of a Life lived in harmony and self-alignment is available to all of us. Yet at times we choose to ignore our heart’s calling. We blindly turn away from heeding our intuitive messages that urge us to clarify and honor our path.

 It has been said that regret is “self-inflicted” guilt: an undermining emotion with its roots in self-condemnation. We experience regret each time we wish we’d made a different decision regarding our behavior in our past.

 Regret can create a loop in our lives where we internally suffer the consequences of that choice, over and over again.

 Seeds of regret are planted in our consciousness when we deny the truth of who we are.  When we respond to an opportunity from the limitations of our ego rather than from the expansiveness of our heart, we nurture our regret!

 Do you have a habit of procrastinating until an opportunity is lost? Do you then secretly or perhaps blatantly, beat yourself up about it?

 Do you hesitate just long enough so as to eliminate the need to decide? Do you then blame yourself for being weak or others for being unfair?

 Do you stockpile those lost opportunities to fuel your resentment and regret?

 In her book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing, author Bronnie Ware shares what she learned about regrets while offering palliative care to hundreds of people.

 Her Life was transformed by the collective grief and guilt of those who shared what they wish they’d done differently during their Life. Inevitably, all of our lives come to a place where - opportunities for change - are no longer offered.

 In a way, Bronnie Ware’s transformation can be the ultimate wake up call for us! We are not required to carry our regrets with us to the grave. We can change the trajectory and quality of our Life NOW by taking action to dismantle our regrets.

Here are the 5 most common regrets that were shared in end of Life reflection:

 I wish I had the courage to live a Life true to myself, not the Life others expected of me.

• Is there an aspect of your Life where you are living out of alignment with yourself?

• What belief do you have that keeps you from changing that?

• What could it mean to you to find the courage to initiate a truer direction?

 I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

• What belief do you have about being successful?

• What sacrifices have you been suffering because of that belief?

• If you let go of needing to work so hard, what might fill your Life instead?

 I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

• What happens to the energies of the feelings that you suppress?

• If you shared your feelings truthfully, how could your Life be different?

• Imagine the freedom you could experience by honoring how you feel.

 I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

• Take a moment to review the friends who’ve made a difference in your Life.

• How have you continued to cultivate those valued relationships?

• Who could you reach out to today to rekindle that connection?

 I wish I had let myself be happier.

• What do you believe about being deserving?

• Could you forgive yourself for the mistakes and wrongdoings you believe you have committed?

• Just for today, could you give yourself permission to be happier?

Dismantling the regrets of our past is the first step to choosing a more fulfilling Life for ourselves. Consciously living in the present empowers our authentic and courageous response to each opportunity Life offers us!

PONDER THIS

What action could you take today to disband one regret
that you’ve been harboring?

  

 Taking responsibility for changing your Life is a powerful courageous decision! Learning how to make choices to honor you and your happiness is a practice, a new skill. I have partnered with others for over 35 years to teach, guide, and support them in this transformational process. If you’re ready to make changes in your Life, Click here to schedule a 30 min consultation to see how I might support you with that.

TAME THE KRAKEN!

TAME THE KRAKEN!

“Between stimulus and response there is a space.
In that space is our power to choose our response.
In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

— Viktor E. Frankl

In Scandinavian folklore, the kraken is described as a gigantic sea monster. It has multiple spiked tentacles protruding from its head with powerful suckers that line the underside.

It is told that the kraken could appear out of nowhere, attacking and terrorizing everything in its path. Sailors claimed the monsters possess an uncanny ability to deceive and remain rampant -simply by paralyzing its opponents with fear.

In the 2010 movie Clash of the Titan’s, Zeus (Liam Neeson) in his final  effort to cease the fighting between the mortals and the Gods - thunders his command “Release the kraken!”

I remember watching that movie and shuddering at the sound of what felt like armageddon. 

What if COVID-19 is the kraken being unleashed upon us in 2020?

It is deceptively present without being visible, terrorizes all within its reach and lacks any discrimination in choosing its victims. Its powerful tentacles rip through the infrastructure of our lives. It shreds our health, education, economic and social systems. 

The virus incites irrational fear and claims devastating loss. It blurs our trust in everything we know to be familiar. The prolonged threat and trauma strain and distort our connection - the very nucleus of human relationships.

Though both Earth and her people have engaged in horrific battles, the greatest impact has not been from the outer chaos we observe.

The great disconnect comes from its insidious penetration into our individual hearts and psyche…

Yet, there is a ray of Hope - a course of action, a path still illuminated!

That light is within us as our spirit spark, our free-will, and our power of choice.

Rather than fight a battle I cannot win, I seek that space within me that is solid, safe, and free. I reconnect for guidance, direction, and support with my 7 tenets of Life.

Courage - I revive my valiant warrior!

Focus - I consciously direct my attention.

Integrity - I emulate my stance of truth.

Compassion - I cultivate kindness, acceptance, love.

Presence - I create and communicate from this now moment.

Surrender - I empower my freedom by letting go.

Gratitude - I choose to live in a state of rejoicing! 

 When I choose my response, I am empowered to tame the kraken and remain afloat.

PONDER THIS:

How do you exercise your innate power to respond
to the triggers of your world?

Be Here Now

BE HERE NOW

Ram Dass

“‘NOW’ is where you get to leave your ego behind
and meet your whole Self”

— Robert Holden

It’s been several weeks since I took a nasty fall from my new horse Milo. We were riding out on the road when Milo spooked at our neighbor as he rounded the fence with his lawn mower. Although the accident seemed spontaneous, when I relive it from my heart-sight, it plays out in sequential slow motion.

After six hours at the ER the x-rays and CAT-scan confirmed closed fractures of my lumbar 1, 2, & 3 vertebra, a rib fracture, and of course, multiple abrasions.

The most obvious gift from this experience has been the reminder to Be Here Now, to live in the present moment, to be conscious and accepting of Life as it is!

This is what I learned about grace and healing…

Gratitude can ground me from moment to moment and allow me to experience physical pain without resisting it. Gratitude gives me permission to feel my other feelings, including the deep sadness I felt for the first 3 days. Gratitude reminds me to keep my focus on healing and acknowledge the progress I make each day.

Empathy and compassion encourage me to be kind, loving, and accepting. They allow me to be free from my need to blame or feel sorry for myself. Empathy and compassion connect me with others who struggle too, with a personal set back, a chronic illness, or an overwhelming challenge.

Self-Care becomes the sole priority in order to function and get through the day. It teaches me that listening to what my body needs is the only important voice in my head. Beyond my imagination, self-care dispels my fear and manifests healing miracles.

My judgement fell away and took with it, my need to define myself by my accomplishments. The stress I create to keep up and to perform, dissolved. I released the focus I had on competing for outside attention.

When I let go of fueling my critical monkey mind, a new appreciation surfaced- a deep more loving connection with my whole self.

Living consciously transcends me and my awareness to a different plane. Time dances with a new rhythm. In the present, I could allow myself to honor my objective observer. I witness in awe, the power my body has to heal itself!

I’ve learned that pain is the great leveler. It abruptly slices through our reality and rattles our perception. It eliminates our preoccupation with the past and annihilates any value we might give to future thinking.

Pain can shatter dreams while offering clarity and connection. It can humbly bring us to our knees and at the same time - direct us to find a new way home…

Today I am happy to share that I feel strong and healthy. I know now, how to proceed with training and developing my relationship with Milo.

I trust my body to continue to mend those physical and emotional parts of me that were wounded. I remain committed to living in a state of gratitude. I practice empathy and compassion with myself (first), and with others.

And Self-care? It is just that!

Self-care means nurturing the connection we have with our inner wisdom and that still small voice that is forever untouched and unlimited in the now!   

PONDER THIS:

What have you experienced where pain shattered a dream yet brought you clarity and connection?